8 Traits of Overprotective Mothers
Here’s a list of 8 traits of overprotective mothers to keep in mind. Although parents always want what’s best for their children, there are times when what we think is good actually ends up hurting them.
There are a lot of overprotective parents who sometimes unconsciously prevent their children from taking control of their own lives. They end up preventing their children from taking on their own responsibilities, having their own experiences and personal freedom.
Have you ever wondered if you’re an overprotective mom? Take a look at these signs and find out for yourself.
Remember that your work as a mother shouldn’t only focus on protecting your children and preventing them from having confrontations.
It is also important for you to give them the tools to face and overcome challenges. Tools that will help them become independent and capable people.
“Children who only hear praises become addicted to them. They avoid difficult tasks that make them feel insecure and they end up giving up when they embark on activities that they are not good at.”
-Ashley Merryman-
Traits that make an overprotective mom
1. Trying to solve all of their children’s problems
When difficulties arise, overprotective mothers like to take control immediately. They try their best to prevent their children from experiencing any kind of discomfort.
When children never experience discomfort, they aren’t allowed to develop tolerance towards frustration. It also reduces their ability to solve problems.
2. Excessive contact with their children’s school
Instead of teaching their children how to confront situations on their own, they seek intervention from third parties. When a problem occurs at school, overprotective parents go straight to the teachers for them to solve it.
It doesn’t matter how small the problem is, they look for immediate help to keep their children in a protected bubble.
3. Doing anything to ensure their children succeed in everything
Human beings learn thousands of lessons from mistakes and frustration. Children who have overprotective parents don’t get a chance to get involved in activities that allow them to learn new things.
Sure, they have good intentions, but the child is deprived of the chance to explore and develop new skills.
4. They can be extremely condescending when things don’t go well
It is important for children to be able to identify and express how they feel. They need to learn how to deal with sadness, anger and helplessness.
Rather than doing everything to make them feel good, we have to help them accept and overcome challenges.
5. They control their children’s friendships
The people who live with children during their childhood and adolescence carry heavy influence on their behavior. Overprotective mothers try to prevent their children from interacting with others they consider to be “bad.”
It is the children themselves who need to realize who is “good” and who is “bad.” Learning how to create healthy interpersonal relationships is a skill that people must develop on their own.
6. They constantly invade their children’s world
Being constantly vigilant of what children are up to can be unhealthy. It is right for a mother to be concerned about the well-being of her children, however, crossing the limit can be harmful.
As they grow older, children will start to demand their privacy to start their own lives. This is completely normal and part of the maturation process.
Overprotective parents don’t respect these limits and they don’t respect their child’s right to keep things secret.
7. They don’t assign chores or responsibilities at home
Cooperation and the sense of belonging to a family is built on discipline. Children who are overprotected don’t understand the concept of reciprocity or contributing to society.
If this happens, children start to believe that their own feelings, thoughts and needs should be everyone’s priority.
8. They disguise the true nature of the world
As adults, parents know that the world is full of injustices and unpleasant situations. Children also need to know about the existence of these dangers. They need to be prepared to overcome them.
If they aren’t prepared, they’ll be at risk of being consumed by this fierce world.
How many of these signs of overprotective mothers have you related with? Even if you want the best for your children, you must teach them to be prepared to handle difficult situations on their own.
You won’t always be around to help them get everything they need. Help them become independent and resilient adults.
All cited sources were thoroughly reviewed by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, currency, and validity. The bibliography of this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.
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- Mosquera Howard, Y. N., Gutiérrez Esteban, S. P., & Vargas Amézquita, S. L. (2016). Desarrollo social en niños sobreprotegidos (Doctoral dissertation). http://repository.unac.edu.co/handle/11254/224
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- Cando Yaguar, M. E., & Campaña Toapanta, L. D. R. (2017). La sobreprotección infantil (Bachelor’s thesis, Latacunga: Universidad Técnica de Cotopaxi; Facultad de Ciencias Humanas y Educación; Licenciatura en Educación Básica). http://repositorio.utc.edu.ec/bitstream/27000/4316/1/PI-000476.pdf
- Caguano, M., & Elizabeth, A. (2016). La sobreprotección de los padres y su influencia en el lenguaje oral de los niños de inicial I de la unidad educativa Combatientes de Tapi Riobamba 2016 (Bachelor’s thesis, Riobamba, UNACH 2016). http://dspace.unach.edu.ec/bitstream/51000/3222/1/UNACH-FCEHT-TG-2016-00117.pdf
- Durán, I. G. Hijos sobreprotegidos: el peligro del narcisismo.
- Levy, D. M. (1943). Maternal overprotection. https://my.apa.org/apa/idm/login.seam?ERIGHTS_TARGET=http%3A%2F%2Fpsycnet.apa.org%2Frecord%2F1943-04306-000&AUTHENTICATION_REQUIRED=true
- Thomasgard, M., & Metz, W. P. (1993). Parental overprotection revisited. Child Psychiatry and Human Development, 24(2), 67-80. https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/BF02367260