Tips for Communication Between Mothers and Daughters

Mother-daughter relationships aren't always easy. However, it's possible to establish a bond based on trust and dialogue. We'll give you some tips to encourage your daughter to talk to you more.

Undoubtedly, communication between mothers and daughters is usually very special. In most cases, girls prefer to talk with their mothers and place their trust in her. This happens when communication is fluid and natural.

But relationships between mothers and daughters aren’t always easy. In some cases, there are endless daily conversations, but in others the talks are limited and don’t include too many details.

Next, we’ll describe how the mother-daughter relationship evolves.

The different stages of the mother-daughter relationship

The relationship between mothers and daughters can be close and sometimes even suffocating. The bond between both begins in childhood and continues through adolescence and into adulthood.

The three stages of the mother-daughter bond include:

1. The mother-girl relationship

During this first stage, the mother may represent the girl’s only confidant. The little girl shares her first secrets about school or comments about her new friendships. The trust between them is complete, which allows them to freely express their thoughts and feelings.

All of these reactions translate into a beautiful bond during childhood. However, as the years go by, conflicts can arise and the relationship becomes more complicated.

2. The mother-adolescent relationship

The small talkative girl grows into a person with emotions that prove difficult to control. During this time, it’s much more complicated for the daughter to trust her mother.

In the midst of adolescence, girls seek more independence from their family. The relationships she has with her friends feel stronger. As a result, she prefers to share her secrets with her friends, such as stories about her crushes.

During this time, conflict between mothers and daughters can grow little by little. Daughters have opportunities to rebel as they search for their independence. Among other things, daughters learn to have opposing opinions and forge their own personalities.

3. The mother-adult daughter relationship

When we enter the adult world, everything happens more naturally. When the daughter matures, she reaffirms her rebellions. The mother cannot limit or influence the way her daughter lives.

Therefore, the mother must understand that the time to raise her daughter is over, and it’s time to now concentrate on having a healthy bond with her.

6 tips for encouraging communication between mothers and daughters

We recommend that you, as a mother, remain present in your little girl’s life without being invasive. She may not want to trust you with all her curiosities or secrets if she feels judged by you.

For that reason, it’s advisable to keep your distance, even in the role of a confidant. Here are some ways you can achieve that:

1. Start talking to your daughter at a young age.

Talking with your daughter about important issues is something you should start doing in the pre-adolescence stage. Have debates that are age appropriate and progress as she matures, especially between the ages of 11 and 14.

2. Having an open mind will help her talk to you.

If you manage to be a little less critical and more open-minded mother, your daughter will be much more willing to confide in you.

She may sometimes refuse to respond or share more information when you ask questions. Try to avoid pressuring her to share details she doesn’t want to.

3. Find the balance between being a friend and a mother

One of the keys is to balance the mother-daughter relationship from an early age. Trying to be too close to your daughter can be counterproductive.

Some moms try so hard to make themselves accessible to their daughters that they go into unnecessary detail. A mother can be a friend and a confidant, but she must always remain a mother.

4. Share family rituals

Family rituals can be events, celebrations, or occasions that allow mothers and daughters to simply have a good time together. For your daughter, these moments represent an opportunity to share stories, concerns and experiences.

If you start these activities early, your daughter will maintain these habits during her adolescence and even into adulthood.

5. Look for solutions with your daughter

Let your daughter suggest her solutions when you talk about a problem she has and try to solve it with her. Girls need advice, but they also want to be part of the solution. This method will encourage her to talk to you when she has a problem.

6. Use current media to start conversations with your daughter

Make communication with your daughter an integral part of your life. New communication tools can strengthen ties. Feel free to share everything that interests you with her. Also, don’t hesitate to discuss issues and exchange opinions.

In short, although girls prefer to talk with their mothers, you should know that the relationship between mothers and daughters is never simple. It can be problematic, but it can also be rich and very solid.

Don’t forget that having a mother who listens to you, supports you and loves you is the greatest blessing in life.