The Importance of Godmothers in Our Children’s Lives

· May 17, 2018

Today on YouAreMom, we want to talk about the importance of godmothers.

Many mothers feel the pressure of choosing godparents for their children. However, we don’t always realize the importance of this figure in the life of our little ones.

Contrary to what many think, godmothers aren’t figures that you choose solely for religious occasions and birthday parties.

During the first years of your child’s life, the excitement inspired by this tender time period is present in family and friends. Everything is full of fun and laughter, simplicity.

But each person’s role is much more important than we might think.

Godmothers are a unique and important figure in our children’s lives. They carry their own characteristics that distinguish them from other family members.

A godmother doesn’t necessarily have to be related to her godchild by blood. Godmothers can be the mother’s friends, or some other person that has played an important role in her life, such as a cousin, for example.

The tradition of choosing a godmother comes from Catholicism. A baby’s parents are called to choose two special people in order for the child to receive the sacrament of baptism.

These two figures are the child’s godparents, and they’re chosen to care for the child in case the biological parents are unable to do so.

In the past, this task was taken very seriously, as the chosen couple would be the people who would take care of the child in the case of the parents’ death. Therefore, being chosen as a godfather or godmother wasn’t only an honor, but a responsibility. It went much further than simple friendship with the parents.

What are the functions of a godmother

  • Caring for the well-being of her godchild
  • Providing counsel during conflict
  • Helping out with the child’s upbringing
  • Loving and protecting the child
  • Building bridges between the parents and godchild whenever necessary
  • Being a role model that the child can follow
  • Being present during important moments in the child’s life (birthdays, graduations, school events, religious occasions, wedding, etc)
  • Maintaining open and constant communication with the child
  • Having fun with the godchild and making him or her happy
The Importance of Godmothers in Our Children's Lives?

How should I choose a godmother for my child

First of all, remember you should choose a person you truly trust and confide in. Look for a person who has shown herself worthy of the title.

She should be someone responsible, intelligent, caring, and able to care for the safety and well-being of your child.

The person you choose to be your child’s godmother will be a combination of your child’s second mother and a very close friend.

Choose your child’s godmother thoughtfully and don’t choose just anyone. Even if you have a close relationship with someone, that doesn’t mean she has the ability or the means to take on such an important role in your child’s life.

Sisters or friends?

Many of the problems related to this issue arise when it comes to choosing the right person for the role. 

First, because it’s hard to choose. Second, because it may cause conflict among those who thought they would be chosen and weren’t. Lastly, because it’s hard to please everybody.

In this sense, social relationships are complicated and require a lot of tact and balance.

In some families, it’s quite common to choose the mother’s sister as the godmother of her niece or nephew. This is because family ties connect her to the baby and, supposedly, she’ll be a good mentor.

However, choosing your sister to be your child’s godmother isn’t a requirement.

The bond that links your true family is not one of blood, but of respect and joy in each other’s life

-Richard Bach-

There may be cases in which the mother is an only daughter or doesn’t have a close relationship with her sisters. And let’s not forget about aunts, grandparents, cousins or the father’s sisters, who may also be able to take on this role.

What’s truly important is that we choose a good candidate, rather than looking specifically for a blood relative.

There are also people who have a tradition of choosing their best friend to be their child’s godmother.

So when you ask yourself, sister or friend?, the answer is: Choose whoever’s best for your child. 

This isn’t a time for preferences or competition, but rather who is best suited for helping to care for and guide your child from now on.

If I’m a godmother, what do I need to do?

The Importance of Godmothers in Our Children's Lives?

If you’ve been chosen to be someone’s godmother, consider yourself fortunate! This is a role that the parents value greatly. They were sure to have chosen you out of a number of important people in their lives.

If they chose you, it’s because they trust you and know you’ll be there no matter what.

The most important thing a godmother needs to do is love her godchild. Your job consists of playing with him, helping him when he needs it, watching him grow up, and providing advice when he needs it.

Don’t feel like you need to shower him with gifts or spoil him. A godmother isn’t a toy store. From now on, you’re like family, and you should act as such.

You might also become your godchild’s guardian if something were to happen to the mother and father. 

Don’t be overwhelmed by this aspect. It doesn’t mean something bad is going to happen. But if the unfortunate were to occur, the child will need your support.

The title you’ve been assigned is worthy of respect and admiration. Don’t feel nervous or think you’re unprepared. When it comes to loving someone, you’re always prepared.

Talk with the parents

If you have any doubts or you’re worried about something, talk about it. First of all, talk about it with the child‘s parents. They’ll explain why they chose you above so many others.

Without a doubt, they’ll also provide you with some tools and insights that will help you understand their expectations and fulfill your role without any problems.

Remember that no one can force you to do something you don’t want to do. For some, the job of a godmother is a blessing. For others, it’s a cause for stress.

This may be due to external factors that make a woman feel unable physically or emotionally. Above all else, be honest.