Raising Children Who Want to Succeed

Discover why it's important to teach children from an early age to want to succeed.
Raising Children Who Want to Succeed

Last update: 27 September, 2018

Children often give up when they can’t draw a certain shape or build a figure with blocks. This is normal and will happen more than once. But it’s our job as parents to motivate them to fight for what they want. This teaches our children that they should want to succeed.

It’s not wise to allow children to get used to quitting what they’ve started halfway through finishing. It’s also not recommended for adults to pick up the slack and finish what their children started. The best message to convey is that perseverance pays off. 

Our children’s future could depend on this magical lesson that motivates them to never give up. Perseverance, overcoming obstacles, and a sense of optimism are ideas that cannot be missing in the minds of our children.

Today’s children are under constant pressure

The current world is very technical. Today’s major difficulties aren’t related to artistic and athletic abilities. Now, we all need to master new technologies.

It’s therefore essential to teach children how to manage their emotions, especially frustration when something goes wrong. The goal is to help children develop emotional intelligence which allows them to overcome disagreements or obstacles.

We must let children know that there are many opportunities in life and that mistakes allow us to improve and to achieve other goals.

Raising Children Who Want to Succeed

It’s also important for children to see their parents complete everything they start. But without proper management, children could get frustrated when their own results aren’t the same. Allowing projects to be abandoned and expecting perfection are destructive attitudes.

The message must be one of motivation, support and leadership

With all that said, what we say to children when they feel like they’ve failed is important. It’s an excellent idea to use a problem from the child’s past to explain that achievements are progressive and require perseverance.

Another fundamental aspect is how children handle their emotions when they get frustrated by small things. They should be able to express what they think and we should listen carefully. Otherwise, their annoyance will increase and we’ll be encouraging children to leave everything half done.

Good listening and reasoning result in motivation. Their ideas will begin to generate and soon children will begin their efforts anew.

Our goal is to invite them to try again and again, until they feel good about themselves. On the other hand, it’s necessary for them to know when to stop. They need to know that extremes are also harmful.

Highlight their improvements and encourage them to excel

“Mom, I want to draw, but my ideas don’t come out.” Your child sees that his drawing doesn’t match what is in his mind, so he pushes the paper aside, annoyed. Now is the time for you to explain how success works. 

What children should begin to internalize is the idea that every learning process is progressive. They’ll achieve their objectives through practice.

Every time they try again, we should encourage them and give them constructive criticism so that they can continue with a good attitude until they finish.

Raising Children Who Want to Succeed

The importance of letting children do their chores

To transmit the desire to excel in children, it’s necessary to let them do their chores. We should of course guide and help them with complex tasks. But we mustn’t intervene to such an extent that we inhibit their own participation in the process. In easy tasks, the right thing to do is to supervise and let them do the rest.

Children whose parents are responsible for doing chores don’t take responsibility or learn to deal adequately with situations. They won’t be very persevering people and will seek to rely on others to avoid having to make an effort.

Finally, to convey the desire to succeed to children, we must give our own example of perseverance. After all, how can we expect them to continue to try if we, as adults, throw in the towel?


All cited sources were thoroughly reviewed by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, currency, and validity. The bibliography of this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.

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  • Garrido-Rojas, L. (2006). Apego, emoción y regulación emocional. Implicaciones para la salud. Revista latinoamericana de psicología, 38(3), 493-507. https://www.redalyc.org/pdf/805/80538304.pdf
  • Marrone, M., Diamond, N., Juri, L., & Bleichmar, H. (2001). La teoría del apego: un enfoque actual. Madrid: Psimática.
  • Moneta, M. (2003). El Apego. Aspectos clínicos y psicobiológicos de la díada madre-hijo. Santiago: Cuatro Vientos.
  • Para, B. B. V. A. (2000). Educación en valores. https://www.compromisorse.com/upload/reportaje/000/106/20-21%20bbva.pdf

This text is provided for informational purposes only and does not replace consultation with a professional. If in doubt, consult your specialist.