Rough Day? Don't Take It Out on Your Children

Your day-to-day life can be very stressful and taking this stress home can result in unpleasant moments and situations. Here are some very practical tricks to help you control your stress and work anxiety, and stop you from taking it out on your children.
Rough Day? Don't Take It Out on Your Children

Last update: 05 September, 2019

Often enough, stress and anger can take the worst out of us and, sometimes, it can be hard improving your mood. You’ve had a rough day? Then, these tricks to not take it out on your children will improve the mood at home and will help you all have a great time.

If, when you get home, your kids hadn’t done their homework, you might feel a little irritated. If they don’t want to eat or throw a tantrum, it’s easy to lose your cool. It can also happen when you’ve been dealing with them for hours.

You know you shouldn’t yell at them, or mistreat them, but sometimes you can blow up and take it out on your children.

All of this can get worse if you’ve had a rough day at work. Don’t worry, here you can find some tips to deal with this.

Basically, everything comes down to self-control and focusing on your goals. If you know what you want your children to do, it’ll be easier to reach your goals. Getting them to eat, do their homework, or take a shower… these are little things that can end up in a big fight if you don’t know how to deal with them.

Rough Day? Don't Take It Out on Your Children

Rough day? 11 tricks to help you not take it out on your children

If you’ve had a rough day, these tricks will help you not take it out on your children. If you feel stress taking over, try to keep control. Taking deep breaths can be a good start. Inhale through your nose, exhale through your mouth. This oxygenates your brain and keeps you calm.

Simultaneously, try to understand why you’re in a bad mood. Once you’ve identified why you’re angry, it’ll be easier to work it out. If everyone takes too long to get ready to go to school, then waking up earlier can be a good fix.

Teach your children about values

Only impose your views when necessary. Maybe it’s best to focus on them doing homework, and not on taking a bath. This can be done later. Share ideas with your children, let them speak, don’t tell them to sit still.

If your children don’t have the best handwriting, don’t push it. If they’re not always on time or aren’t sociable, don’t push it either. Don’t try to make them into a version of yourself, remember they have their own personalities and lives.

Don’t always make them do things, they’ll always fight you and this will make your day worse. Trying to impose your values on them won’t have good results.

Know your limitations

Before you get home, or maybe when you’re already there, try to find some place where you can be alone so you can relax. Listen to your favorite music or just close your eyes and rest.

If the children are safe and your partner’s home, this will be easy. Wash your face with cold water to release any tension there.

Knowing your limitations will make things easier for you. It’s difficult to excel at being a mom, a housewife, a worker, and a cook. You may collapse at some point if you’re not aware of how far you can go.

“We know we shouldn’t scream at them or mistreat them, but sometimes we can explode and take it out on our children. Everything gets worse if we a had a rough day at work.”

Rough Day? Don't Take It Out on Your Children

Alone or with them

To avoid any altercations, it’s convenient to have dedicated personal spaces, at least once a week, to share with friends, close ones, or to play a sport. Away from stress at work or at home, you can enjoy those recreations and start feeling better.

You also need to spend time with your children. Try to do it often and make them count. This will keep conflict at a minimum, it’ll make you closer and more capable to understand each other.

Ask for forgiveness, don’t be demeaning

Saying you’re sorry will be very helpful if you can’t control your bad mood. Try to make them understand what made you angry and don’t let them feel guilty.

Don’t be demeaning towards your children. Saying things like, “You never do anything right”, “You’re useless”, “You’re bad at everything”, are harmful and aren’t beneficial. Instead of understanding why their mother’s upset, they’ll grow up thinking it’s their fault, and this can bring very bad consequences later.

Rough Day? Don't Take It Out on Your Children

As a parent, be an example to your children

Usually, children will follow their parents’ footsteps. Whatever you do today, they’ll do it tomorrow. If you yell at them or mistreat them, they’ll do the same to their children. If you undermine them, the pattern will repeat itself later.

Anyhow, it’s always possible to start over. When you’re having a bad day, just stop and reflect on what made you feel that way.

These tricks will improve your relationship with your children and you’ll start feeling much better about yourself.

This text is provided for informational purposes only and does not replace consultation with a professional. If in doubt, consult your specialist.