The Hope That Rainbow Babies Restore For Us
Rainbow babies are children who arrive to the world healthy and strong after a mother has suffered a miscarriage or loss of an infant.
These babies bring us something more than happiness. They bring us hope and a much needed new beginning with which a family can put themselves back together after the loss of a child.
One topic that is not talked about often is that of miscarriages, of the deaths of these unborn babies or those who leave this earth early for whatever reason, to become those star children who live forever in the center of their parents" hearts.
It is a complex topic and at moments cruel. Many mothers have to deal with a certain lack of social awareness, because as is often said, losing a 10-year-old child is not the same as losing a baby that you have not yet met, who had not yet begun to live.
One point that we should make clear from the start is that any loss is important. One cannot be compared to another and each one of them is experienced in a devastating way.
The pain of losing a child, even if it is due to a miscarriage, is experienced in a variety of ways. There will be families who face such an event with courage, and there will be mothers who fall into a state of deep helplessness to the point of developing depression.
Star children, those babies who are born and pass away within the mother are beings who existed, who fought to live and who wanted to grow, but to whom fate denied that opportunity.
Something that is well known to the parents of rainbow babies, who can bring hope after a loss, is that these children are not there to replace their lost sibling.
Each child has his or her place in their parents" hearts. Each baby is and will always be unique even if their life is taken early.
The Star Baby and Our Inner Storm
Miscarriage and infant loss are more common than we think. So much so that it is essential that a psychological protocol and assistance be available to serve families and especially mothers affected by it.
- Each woman will experience this loss in her own way, but she must be able to live through the pain in a safe way, accompanied by her loved ones, and in turn, with the support of the appropriate professionals.
- To this day, something that is becoming more and more common is that many women have experienced failed attempts to become pregnant. When they finally achieve this, it is possible to have not just one miscarriage, but several.
- This experience can be very complicated. The star children leave us and shine bright up in the sky to give us light, but for a while, the mother will feel a storm inside her, darkness, and even the exasperating feeling that “she herself is responsible" for that loss. This thought needs to be addressed and refuted.
Rainbow Babies: Hope in a Unique Form, a Light in a Strong Heart
Grieving for the loss of a baby can be a long or short process but it will always be carried in the heart.
It is a pain that many mothers carry in private and that in some way, they will always keep inside. Although yes, they will learn to live with it.
For a while, something that is very common in couples is a reluctance to try again. The fear is there.
However, little by little the hope and the desire becomes stronger than the fear, and the desire to be parents again turns a miracle into reality: a Rainbow Baby, a child that rises from the storm and that brings the dawn after the darkness.
Giving birth to a healthy and precious baby heals, comforts, and at the same time recomposes the mother.
That child brightens the gray days by a thousand shades, and gives us a thousand chances to embrace life again along with this chubby and rosy creature who greets us with their eyes bright and an eagerness to take on the world.
At the same time, some things are very clear to the mothers and fathers of rainbow babies:
- The Rainbow Baby is not here to replace the Star Child.
- The baby who was never born or who we lost before their time will always have a place of their own in the hearts of their family members and in the souls of their parents who will always keep them in their hearts; that umbilical thread, golden and strong, still connects us with the child who left this world early.
- The pregnancy of a new child after the loss of the star child is experienced differently. There is a fear present, and at times it is common to feel panicked, but these emotions are normal and expected. The ideal thing to do in these situations is to maintain good communication between the couple and their doctors.
- The birth of a rainbow baby is also a way of honoring the star child. The healthy and strong child will allow us to demonstrate the love that we have to offer, which we yearned to offer the other baby and which will be reflected in our care for their sibling.
We will do our best for both, for the one that we have with us and the one who looks on from the stars and their place in the center of our heart.