Dear Mom, Don't Forget About Yourself

Becoming a mother is a big, life-changing decision that's as beautiful as it is demanding. So, dear mom, don't forget about yourself.
Dear Mom, Don't Forget About Yourself

Last update: 18 May, 2023

Becoming a mother is one of the most beautiful experiences any woman can go through. However, it’s a big, life-changing decision that’s fraught with great responsibilities and obligations that can be very demanding for one person. So, dear mom, love and protect your little one, but don’t forget about yourself.

All mothers want to give their children all the care they deserve to grow up healthy, being one of the most generous and selfless choices they can make for them. However, daily care, protecting their health, educational lessons, household chores, and work obligations can leave many women feeling exhausted and can eventually lead to physical and emotional problems.

Learn how to find a balance so you don’t forget about yourself

Motherhood is one of the most beautiful stages in women’s lives, but it’s also one of the most demanding. And although we want to provide our children with everything they need to develop, moms don’t have to neglect their own well-being in order to ensure that of their children. Learning to find a balance is necessary to avoid being drowned by all the responsibilities that come with being a mother.

A mother playing with her baby girl.
It’s normal that, at some times, you feel tired because of all your responsibilities. That’s why you should form a team with your partner or family to make them more bearable.

And even though many women voluntarily take upon their shoulders all the obligations and emotional wear that come with having a child, they should know that maintaining their health is essential to continue loving and caring for their little ones.

For this reason, it’s important to learn to use some strategies to lighten the burden of duties and always keep in mind that caring for a child is the responsibility of two people, not just the mother. In this regard, you can avoid serious future problems such as the development of anxiety or depression.

5 tips to not forget yourself while exercising your maternal role

In a sexist and unempathetic society where many women must assume on their own all the obligations that should be shared, the task of finding time so you don’t forget about yourself becomes more difficult. However, when you have a partner who’s aware of their responsibilities as a parent, it’s crucial to share the work equally to be the team that your children need.

Here are some recommendations so you don’t forget about yourself.

1. Don’t seek perfection: You’re human

Being a mother is a difficult job that’s perfected over the years. For this reason, don’t try to be perfect all the time. Your child doesn’t need an immaculate woman as a mother. What they need is a woman who, despite her flaws, strives to improve to give the best of herself.

So don’t stress too much when things don’t go your way. Rather, live and experience your motherhood in a conscious, empathetic, and responsible way. There’s no one way to raise children, so it’s okay to learn from your mistakes and try not to make them again.

2. Focus on the positive things you do

Hurting yourself with intrusive thoughts about things you may have failed at will not make you a better parent. On the contrary, it will only hurt your confidence and self-esteem, something that your children can observe and learn through the example you set for them.

Because of the above, it’s best that you learn from your mistakes with humility and look at all the other positive things you do for the welfare of your little ones. This way, you’ll be able to enhance your strengths and correct those things you want to improve. Motherhood isn’t a competition to see which woman does it best. It’s about being the best version of yourself so you can share positive lessons with your children.

3. Share responsibilities with your partner

Although it’s a slow road, little by little, the sexist idea that women should be more responsible for their children than men is fading in women’s minds. And the fact is that, when making the decision to have a baby, both assumed the obligations that lay ahead.

Being a mother 24/7 is a job that isn’t highly valued and that uses up almost all of a woman’s energy, even to the point of producing mental exhaustion in some. So don’t take on absolutely all the responsibilities for your little one just because you think you’re the only one who can do them well. Trust your partner, and between the two of you, form a team to raise your child in the best possible way.

4. Make quality time for yourself

Many mothers feel guilty when they take time to pamper themselves. However, you should always keep in mind that in order to take care of others, you must first take care of yourself. Because it’s not a matter of you giving up your duties to pamper yourself every day in a spa, but being aware that your effort also deserves a reward.

A woman putting lotion on her face.
Being a mother doesn’t mean that you have to put aside your personal care and hobbies.

So, don’t forget about yourself, and take a few minutes every day to relax and do what you want to do. For example, watch your favorite show, listen to music, or spend time in the garden. Also, at least once a week, plan activities that you know make you happy. Whether it’s going out with friends, having dinner with your partner, playing the guitar, or going for a beauty session. Remember that, before being a mom, you’re a human being with feelings.

5. Learn techniques to manage stress

It’s normal for the mind to become cloudy and be dominated by stress when there are so many daily obligations that we feel we can’t cope with. For this reason, it’s helpful to learn some relaxation techniques such as meditation or mindfulness in order to put them into practice when you consider it necessary.

With the help of these exercises to control stress, you can manage the emotions that accumulate inside and make it easier to stay calm to act in the best possible way. In addition, they’ll allow you to learn to manage time more wisely and give priority to the really important things.

Love and accompany your child, but don’t forget about yourself

Keep in mind that if you don’t have time to take care of yourself, you won’t be able to give your children all the love they need. You won’t be teaching them to look after their own well-being because of the daily stress. This could ultimately affect their self-esteem and confidence.

So, team up with your partner and close family to provide your children with positive parenting. And, to protect your well-being, stop investing all your energy solely on your little ones, and don’t feel guilty about spending quality time with yourself once in a while. This way, by taking care of yourself, you’ll be able to care for your children more effectively.

All cited sources were thoroughly reviewed by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, currency, and validity. The bibliography of this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.

This text is provided for informational purposes only and does not replace consultation with a professional. If in doubt, consult your specialist.