Using the Chores Method to Get Your Children to Help Out

The chores method helps your children learn responsibility from a young age. Your children's chores will become part of their routine.
Using the Chores Method to Get Your Children to Help Out

Last update: 16 September, 2021

“John, can you make your bed?”; “Pedro, can you set the table?”; “Tameka, have you cleaned up your room?” We’ve all dealt with this day-to-day struggle in our homes, and we know how difficult it is to get our children to do their chores. Using the chores method can help you establish these habits from a young age. 

Do you want your children to be responsible, autonomous, and have good self-esteem? The chores method can help you do that. This method will foster good habits from a very young age. In addition, it will greatly improve their involvement at home. Keep reading to learn more!

Using the chores method

Whenever we ask our children to do certain tasks, they complain, they say no, and they get upset. They’ll often tell us that they’re too busy. We all know that most children don’t like doing chores. They don’t like being required to do work around the house.

Simple chores for a child.

However, when they go over to their friends’ houses, something surprising happens. They’re the one who helps out the most. Their friends’ parents will say, “What a great son you have! He helped clear the table without anyone asking him to! He helped us so much.” That’s when you start to wonder if they’re actually talking about your kid.

As parents, we have to make sure our children understand that we live in a society where everyone has responsibilities. They not only have to be responsible for keeping their own room tidy, but they also have some responsibilities around the rest of the house. Everyone has to work together to take care of the home.

How does the chores method improve self-esteem?

When children have responsibilities and chores and they know what they need to do to help out, they feel useful around the house. Therefore, they’re proud of their actions and their self-esteem will improve. What’s more, children with high self-esteem will do better in everything.

Keys to effectively using the chores method

If you want the chores method to work, you need to keep a few things in mind:

Chores must be age-appropriate

The chores you assign your children will depend on their age. If you have several children of all different ages, you can’t ask them to all do the same amount of chores.

Hold a family meeting so you can organize the chores

You should hold a family meeting in which all the members are present. During that meeting, you can tell each child what their chores will be. That way, you’ll be demonstrating how important these chores are to your children, and you’ll all be collaborating to decide on who does what.

You should change your chores periodically

Every so often, you should change who does what chore. You can change them every season, or make the change on a quarterly basis. 

That way, your children will know when they have a new chore assignment. Additionally, if you notice that one of your children isn’t doing their chore, or they’re doing it poorly, you can change their chores sooner.

Don’t do their chores for them

If your child’s chore is to make their bed, and they don’t make it, you shouldn’t do it for them. That way, when they go to bed, they’ll have to deal with an unmade bed. 

Or, if their chore is to set the table, and they don’t set it, you shouldn’t set it for them. Then, when everyone sits down at the table for dinner, there won’t be any silverware. Your child will realize that you can’t eat that way. And this will help them realize how important their chores are and they won’t refuse to do them again.

Children should have at least two chores

We recommended assigning your children at least two chores. One of those should be a personal chore and another should be a family one. 

Types of chores

It's important to set deadlines for your children's chores.

Personal chores

  • Putting your toys away
  • Setting your clothes out for school
  • Getting your backpack ready for school
  • Making your bed
  • Putting your dirty clothes in the hamper or washing machine

Family chores

  • Watering the plants
  • Reading your younger siblings a story
  • Picking up their clothes
  • Vacuuming
  • Loading and emptying the dishwasher


As you can see, the chores method is a great way to get your children used to their responsibilities. In addition, it makes their chores part of their daily routine. Once they feel responsible for the tasks they need to do, they’ll start to become part of their day-to-day activities. In the future, your little one will be more independent and they won’t have a hard time taking care of the tasks they need to do.


This text is provided for informational purposes only and does not replace consultation with a professional. If in doubt, consult your specialist.