7 Habits to Avoid When Raising Teenagers

Raising teenagers takes patience, strength, and being a good role model. But it's also best to avoid certain behaviors. 
7 Habits to Avoid When Raising Teenagers

Last update: 06 January, 2019

When it comes to raising teenagers, be very careful of what you do and say. Remember that during this phase of their lives, adolescents are forming their own characters and deciding who they want to be.

It’s best to avoid extreme strictness or laxness.  This helps your teenager to have more balanced behavior.

Although you don’t want your children to experience any type of suffering or discomfort, both are actually very important. Why? Because you won’t always be there to protect and defend them, nor will you always be able to comfort them.

Adult life is full of obstacles. Children should be prepared in the best way possible, and learn to fend for themselves. 

Most Common Errors When Raising Teenagers

1. Making them think they’re the center of the universe

Of course your kids are the most important thing in your life, and it’s great to show them that you love them. However, children who are idolized rather than loved will grow up thinking the world revolves around them.

Love your kids as much as you can, but don’t let them become egotistical and self-centered. You’ll help them develop a healthy self-esteem while staying grounded.

2. Thinking your kids are perfect

School counselors and teachers can verify that parents never want to hear anything negative about their children. A parent might react by attacking whoever tells them something they didn’t expect to hear about their child. Try to be open to the opinions of other people who interact with your child.

The best thing you can do when raising teenagers is really listen to them before situations get more complicated. Adolescents are still constructing their identities. This means it’s a good time to help them correct their behavior.

3. Living through your kids

Children aren’ t extensions of your hopes and dreams. They have their own goals, desires, and aspirations. Celebrate their successes, but don’t pressure them.

Everything you do should be directed toward their happiness, not increasing yours. Teenagers aren’t a second chance for their parents. They’re autonomous individuals who should follow their own paths.

4. Acting like their best friend

One of the great societal problems is parents who don’t like parenting and aren’t ready for raising teenagers. Wanting love and acceptance from your kids can lead to confusing your roles.

“Being overprotective can be very harmful because it creates citizens who are dependent and sometimes tyrannical. They have grown up believing the world revolves around them, that they rule the house, not that they are a part of a family.”

–Javier Urra–

5. Skipping family time

There is nothing more enriching for a family than sharing quality time together. Although work schedules, fatigue, and housework can make it difficult, you can find  a way to fit it in.

The wonderful thing about having teenage children is everything you’ve gone through to get to this point. A mother or father who is present is the best gift you can give them.

6. Forgetting the importance of a good example

Actions speak louder than words. Parents have the difficult task of modeling the actions they expect from their children.

If you want your children to be the best version of themselves, now is the time for you to be your best self. Remember that they’re always observing you and learning from everything you do.

7. Shielding them from adversity

For children or teenagers to build character, confidence, resilience, and persistence, they need to overcome their own challenges.

Each difficulty they overcome in daily life teaches them new values. The satisfaction of feeling capable and independent helps them become strong, successful adults. 

Over the long run, raising teenagers can come with some serious challenges. Although there isn’t one right way to do things, avoiding these mistakes will keep you on a safer path. 

Guide your children through one of the most beautiful and difficult stages of their lives.

All cited sources were thoroughly reviewed by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, currency, and validity. The bibliography of this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.

  • Casado, I. (2013). Adolescencia. FMC – Formación Médica Continuada En Atención Primaria. https://doi.org/10.1016/s1134-2072(04)75726-6
  • Iglesias Diz, J. L. (2013). Desarrollo del adolescente: Aspectos físicos, psicológicos y sociales. Pediatria Integral.
  • Hurlock, E. (1995). Psicología de la adolescencia. Psicología de la adolescencia.
  • Naranjo, C. R., & González, A. C. (2012). Autoestima en la adolescencia: Análisis y estrategias de intervención. International Journal of Psychology and Psychological Therapy.
  • Roa, A. (1982). La adolescencia. Revista Chilena de Pediatria.
  • Silva-Escorcia, I., & Mejía-Pérez, O. (2014). Autoestima, adolescencia y pedagogía. Revista Electrónica Educare. https://doi.org/10.15359/ree.19-1.13

This text is provided for informational purposes only and does not replace consultation with a professional. If in doubt, consult your specialist.