Exhausted and Without Strength, but Happy

Exhausted and Without Strength, but Happy
Valeria Sabater

Reviewed and approved by the psychologist Valeria Sabater.

Written by Valeria Sabater

Last update: 08 November, 2022

Exhausted, fatigued and without strength: this is how fathers and mothers feel when, at last, they put their children to bed. When children fall into a peaceful sleep, that’s when the exhaustion suddenly transforms into happiness.

The fatigue experienced with the daily raising of children is different. Even though every fiber of our body seems to be out of place, there is something that seems to come together inside. It strengthens us and gives us much more life than we had.

That feeling is called well-being. It is about becoming aware that happiness means sharing and creating. It is knowing that our children are well and that they are growing up healthy and happy thanks to us.

Despite this, we must be aware that family life will not always be like this. It is important to know that as children mature, so will their behavior. And with it, they must accept a series of obligations and challenges.

Parenting and raising a child involve languages of their own, where we never stop learning new terms. Sometimes we tell ourselves that we will not be able to do everything and that we will not reach the end of the day, but nevertheless, we do it.

Almost without realizing it, we stand up as experts, as giants who can see beyond. We anticipate risks and intuit needs. Parenting may not be magical, but it is a wonderful stage.

Our mind is more tired than our body

exhausted father sleeping with his baby

When the end of the day arrives, we are tremendously exhausted. Our arms, legs and head hurt. We also have cramps and sleep to recover. However, curious though it may seem, what intensifies this tiredness is actually our brain.

Stress from hypervigilance

Sometimes psychological pressure is more exhausting than physical exertion. Experts call it hypervigilance stress, which is very similar to what soldiers suffer in contexts of war.

Both the father and the mother have a series of key obligations to their children. They must be alert to any circumstance and present to any disagreement.

There comes a point when this situation can be toxic. Our lives change in such a way that we stop worrying even for ourselves. Our priority is that fragile creature that we must protect and love.

The fear that something bad might happen to him sometimes produces additional fears and anguish, and that small kaleidoscope of emotions ends up generating tremendous anxiety and fatigue.

Together we are exhausted but immensely happy

exhausted but happy parents

Both parents may work outside the home. They may also have agreed that one of the two will temporarily be raising the children. Be that as it may, there is something that should be clear: a child’s education and upbringing is not the job of just one person.

Spending time with your children is the most important thing you will do in your life.

-Anthony Douglas Williams-

Children do not have a sole role model. There is nothing so wonderful as feeling a part of each stage, contributing to all possible tasks.

Saying goodnight to your child is the finishing touch to one more day, a magical moment that takes place day by day. That emotional bond with children is not forgotten, and it builds memories and positive emotions.

Finally alone, finally a moment between us

When we are parents for the first time, intimacy is lost or weakened a little. Love is still present, but sometimes the partnership is lacking and must be rekindled.

That moment when the children finally fall asleep is almost like a date. However, the simple fact of being exhausted can take some of the magic away. There are dark circles, unkempt hair, old pajamas and toys lying on the floor.

And still, we feel happiness. That is the well-being generated by the good work done between two partners.

That’s where we immerse ourselves in some very long talks, where we talk about everything and nothing, where we dream of the future, where we hold hands and fall asleep… of course, always aware of whether our children need us. 

This text is provided for informational purposes only and does not replace consultation with a professional. If in doubt, consult your specialist.