Thank You Letter to The Man who Made Me a Single Mother

Thank You Letter to The Man who Made Me a Single Mother
Valeria Sabater

Reviewed and approved by the psychologist Valeria Sabater.

Written by Valeria Sabater

Last update: 22 December, 2021

This is a true story about a single mother, but at the same time, it’s just another story.

It’s a story about a young university student, like many others who was focused on the casual and playful present, the “here and now” where one expects everything from life… except motherhood.

However, something that at first seemed traumatic to her, became the best thing that ever happened to her.

This story is part of a letter that went viral a while ago on social media. In it, some basic brushstrokes are portrayed of the complex emotional world that many young women find themselves in.

While in a relationship with someone, they become pregnant and are abandoned when they find out about the news.

These stories are so common and so relatable; they can teach us very important lessons.

Sometimes fate forces us to be strong. It makes us discover that what at first seems like the end of the world, is actually the threshold to the most wonderful experience in life.

Here at “YouAreMom” we’d like to talk about this.

You abandoned me but you also gave me many things

single mother and her child

Maybe it wasn’t love or maybe I was the love of his life. Meetings occur and attractions make us feel alive. The love was so intense and no one refuses it when they’re 19 years old.

Whether you get a chance to read this or not, I would like to thank you. Thank you for everything you have done and thank you for everything you have given me.

The protagonist of this story met her partner at a party when she was in university. Like many other relationships that young people have nowadays after 3 years together, she began to believe that it was “true love, eternal love.”

However, this was not the case. After getting pregnant, she was immediately abandoned.

At this point, she made a thoughtful and courageous decision. She decided to continue with the pregnancy in spite of everything.

I used to sit in my room on Saturday nights, 6 months pregnant, and I would curse you for putting me in this situation.

And by the way, you should know that I know the real reason why you didn’t come to visit me in the hospital: You were too busy getting drunk at a Halloween party.

Thank you for leaving me when I told you I was pregnant

Single mother

When a woman becomes pregnant and it’s an unwanted pregnancy, if she makes the decision to carry on with it, the responsibility is entirely hers and she knows it.

It doesn’t matter that she has been abandoned. It doesn’t matter that her heart is broken and shattered, because a new one is growing inside of her.

  • The girl in our story thanks the person who left her after she became pregnant, she chose to carry on with her life. At the end of the day… What use would a person like that have in the life of a child?
  • He decided to continue going on with his parties, relationships, nights full of alcohol and his carelessness.
  • She felt hurt because of this, but only for a while. After a few months, she realized there was a pure, eternal, seamless and wonderful love. It is the love that comes with being a mother.

Thank you for leaving me when you did, because we both know that you would have left us sooner or later. This way my child won’t know what it feels like to have you, only to suffer later from your absence.

Thank you for making me grow

Our protagonist was forced to leave her lifestyle to adopt new routines, new obligations and ever new maps.

She left university to return to her family home, she stopped partying and she left behind her friends from that intense and colorful world to look for a job. She became aware of her real priorities.

This is when she discovered how many things she owed to the man who left her after a 3-year relationship.

  • Thank you for making me realize that whiskeys and cokes are drinks of my past. Fresh juices are the drinks of my future.
  • Thank you for making me understand that hearing my little girl talk to me will always be better than the sound of a DJ at a party.
  • Thank you for teaching me that thousands of dirty diaper are better than waking up alone surrounded by vomit from the previous night.

Being a single mother is one of the greatest achievements for a woman

Being a single mother can help us understand and discover all the things that we are capable of. You become a mother and a father at the same time.

We suffer, cry secretly and even come to think that we won’t be able to handle it all. However as the protagonist of this story proves, it can be achieved and it can be overcome.

It is normal to miss the life you had before. The days when you were only concerned about your exams, getting a date with a boy you liked, thinking about your dreams or organizing an unforgettable party.

Being a single mother at 15, 17 or 19 can be extremely hard, but all things in life can be overcome. You can achieve it and no one can take away all of the experience and wisdom acquired.

You’ve taught me that sometimes the prince isn’t the one who saves the day. Sometimes the prince is a little child riding on a horse that calls you “mommy.”

All cited sources were thoroughly reviewed by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, currency, and validity. The bibliography of this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.

  • Bowlby, J. (1986). Vínculos afectivos: formación, desarrollo y pérdida. Madrid: Morata.
  • Bowlby, J. (1995). Teoría del apego. Lebovici, Weil-HalpernF.
  • Garrido-Rojas, L. (2006). Apego, emoción y regulación emocional. Implicaciones para la salud. Revista latinoamericana de psicología, 38(3), 493-507.
  • Marrone, M., Diamond, N., Juri, L., & Bleichmar, H. (2001). La teoría del apego: un enfoque actual. Madrid: Psimática.
  • Moneta, M. (2003). El Apego. Aspectos clínicos y psicobiológicos de la díada madre-hijo. Santiago: Cuatro Vientos

This text is provided for informational purposes only and does not replace consultation with a professional. If in doubt, consult your specialist.